Emergency Brake …. An Amish woman was driving her buggy to town when a highway patrol officer stopped her.
"I'm not going to cite you," said the officer. "I just wanted to warn you that the reflector on the back of your buggy is broken and it could be dangerous."
"I thank thee," replied the Amish lady. "I shall have my husband repair it as soon as I return home."
"Also," said the officer, "I noticed one of your reins to your horse is wrapped around his testicles. Some people might consider this cruelty to animals, so you should have your husband check that, too."
"Again I thank thee. I shall have my husband check both when I get home."
True to her word, when the Amish lady got home she told her husband about the broken reflector, and he said he would put a new one on it immediately. "Also," said the Amish woman, "The policeman said there was something wrong with the emergency brake."
Free Air Guitar:
The Final Exam ....At a State University , there were four sophomores taking chemistry
and all of them had an "A" so far. These four friends were so confident that,
the weekend before finals, they decided to visit some friends and have a big
party. They had a great time but, after all the hearty partying; they slept all
day Sunday and didn't make it back to State University until early Monday morning.
Rather than taking the final then, they decided that after the final,
they would explain to their professor why they missed it. They said that they
visited friends but on the way back they had a flat tire. As a result, they
missed the final. The professor agreed they could make up the final the next
day. The guys were excited and relieved. They studied that night for the exam..
The next day the professor placed them in separate rooms and gave
them a test booklet. They quickly answered the first problem worth 5 points.
Cool, they thought! Each one in separate rooms, thinking this was going to be
easy. ...
Then they turned the page. On the second page was written....
For 95 points: Which tire? _________
Purse:
Q & A …. Q: Why did the woman cross the road?
A: Never mind that, what the heck is she doing out of the kitchen?
Anger Management …. Husband says: When I get mad at you, you never fight back. How do you control your anger?
Wife says: I clean the toilet.
Husband says: How does that help?
His & Hers:
